keeping 'em busy

i am trying to keep my girls busy so that they won't get bored over the summer. its a bit difficult because i have no helper right now and so i  do the cooking and other household chores aside from taking care of them.

i really want to keep them out of the tv and when the opportunity arises, i engage them into doing something whenever i can. one of the advantages of having no helper is that the kids are always with me and we do almost all things together even the chores.  its one way to teach responsibility. such as fixing the bed, putting their slippers/shoes in the shoe rack, dirty cups in the sink, hanging wet clothes, and water the plants. they also help with the grocery and in the laundry shopw whenever i go there.

start them early learning about business ;)

one activity that we love to do is to bake or make something such as pastillas, brownies, pizza and cookies.

when i am doing something that they can't help, i try not to turn on the tv. i let them browse through their things and let them do or play with whatever they choose. 

read books, learning to read





building bocks

drawing on paper

drawing on the laptop

since raya is still high on her performance during her moving up day we sing and dance to the songs "we're all in this together" (from the movie high school musical), "da coconut nut" (by smokey mountain, and "yesterday's dream". its fun. she's actually the one "teaching" us since she claims she is the only one among the family who "knows" the steps =) we also play pretend of teacher and student wherein i am the teacher and she and rob are the students. i teach syllables to raya and shapes to rob ;) and when the opportunity calls it, we go out and play ball or go to the park.

or rob walks the nighbor's dogs ;)

and this is just on weekdays. its a whole lot more (and fun) when daddy is around on weekends!

in need of help

its the time again, summer time, wherein helpers/yaya goes for a vacation. this time around, my helper/yaya of 2 years wont be going back anymore. she said that she will try to apply as domestic helper in singapore. my reliever helper said that my current yaya has found another employer who would give her a higher pay. oh well. now im beginning to wonder if we actually are stingy :( hope not. considering we just have a small house, we are not that strict, few workload and i'm home most of the time.

anyway, we are again in search of a dependable and trustworthy helper. according to my friend cimeon, its not hard to find a helper, but actually the credible ones. hay! for the meantime, its me alone handling the chores, errands, and of course, my family. tiring yes. but i keep on thinking that this is an opportunity for me and the kids to bond. so everyday, i come up with ideas on what to do with them. i actually haven't started  doing any new activities yet. still have to manage my time. but for starters, we read more books. i let them paint. i let them play with their new tea set toy and let them "make my tea and bring me cake" while i do other chores. i also bring them to the laundry shop with me. yup, including my 2 year old. they have fun riding the public transport. its actually an adventure for them. i am actually glad they get to enjoy these things. you know, makes us all humble and enjoy simple things in life. makes them face reality that not all the time we have a car. makes them street smart too. it also one way of teaching them about taking care of the business ;) lot to learn when you're out there.

can't say that it's not tiring and stressful especially when the girls fight. it is! but i can't complain. i am blessed to have this time with them. we are blessed in so many ways.

be the man your daughter would marry

my friend selina shared a link in facebook and it is worth sharing. i hope that all the daddies there will be able to read, learn and most especially apply it. i know its hard. being a parent is hard. here's how it goes:

What Every Dad Should Know About Their Daughter

Gina McClain | January 24, 2012 |

Last week I was dropping my daughter off for a birthday party. As I was leaving a man stopped me asking for direction. He was standing with one of my daughter’s school friends. Immediately recognizing her I put my hand out and introduced myself explaining that our daughters sit together at lunch often. His reaction was sarcastic as he gave his daughter a side-ways glance. I didn’t fully catch what he said but whatever it was it didn’t honor his daughter in any way. Looking at her I could tell this was not abnormal behavior.
I’ll be honest… I wanted to punch him.
It’s challenging to articulate the influence a father has on a little girl. How much of his attitude and actions toward her can determine her future relationships. I remember how much stock I placed in what my dad thought of me. I remember how much I wanted him to be proud of me. To affirm me. To show me my value.

I remember how he would brag about me on the sidelines of the soccer field.

How he would tell me I’m beautiful.

How he would hug me so hard I couldn’t breath.

How often he reminded me as a teenager, “Never date a boy you wouldn’t marry.”
(What a way to narrow the playing field!)

Dad’s, don’t lose sight of the impact you have today on your daughter’s future. Here are three things I encourage you to focus on:

Affirm Her

She looks to you for affirmation, encouragement, & guidance. As she grows through puberty (ESPECIALLY, as she grows through puberty), she needs your voice reminding her that she is beautiful, valuable and worthy of love. If she can learn to believe you, then she’ll believe her future husband when he tells her the same things.

Set the Standard

Be the husband you want her to have one day. Enough said. Is it difficult? Yes. Does it mean sacrifice? Yes. Is it worth it? Yes. I watch my husband daily making changes to be a better husband and dad. He’s amazing. He demonstrates for our daughter the kind of man he wants her to marry one day.

Talk About the Standard

Talk about the future. As you “Imagine the End” and think about the man you hope she marries… talk about it! Let her know what you expect. Set the bar. She’ll do everything she can to jump over it.
Let me level with you, dad. The more you affirm her today, the less she’ll seek affirmation in some teenage boy later.

gift of an ordinary day

i definetely will buy the book. whats it about? watch...

simple joys

i've been down lately. call it hormones or mid-life crisis, i don't know. but not knowing what to do or what direction God wants me to take remains a mystery even at this age and that pretty sucks! but i cannot complain. over the years, especially the really tough ones, God was there. despite the down moments, He made Himself felt. He knows how to reach me. it is through giving me my simple joys.

the other night, me and my kids were dancing and singing our hearts out.  raya just had her moving up day and was "teaching" me and rob their program :) just last night, hubby went home early from work and we all had dinner together. after that, we let the kids rode their bikes and went to the store to buy ice cream (their favorite). then we sat on the matted floor, watched cartoons while they ate popcorn. i on the other hand, was beside them reading a book. last weekned, they had enjoyed swimming in their pool.

other moments:

• raya wiping my tear and hugging me
• raya taking care of me when i take a nap (she puts a blanket over me then just be beside the bed, quietly doing her art works)
• raya saying "im doing this because i love you"
• rob holding my hand before we sleep
• rob kissing my 'wounds'
• hubby taking care of the kids everytime he's home early or on weekends

these are priceless things. not only makes me happy but gives me a feeling of peace and contentment.

though there are still questions hanging, He remains faithful, as always.

first taste of summerr

oh yeah, summer has just begun in our household. kids got a surprise when they woke up this morning. daddy has inflated their pool last night. and now this...

they're so happy. even when they were cold, lips purple and teeth chattering, they still wouldn't get out. HEHE. had to force them though. we don't want them to catch cold. they love the water. hmmm, might as well enroll them in swimming class this summer.

again, i love saturdays like this!

lonely day

i often pride myself of having a few trusted friends. sometimes, it is a disadvantage. today is one of those days. perhaps i can wish for more friends (especially the single ones) that i can just drag anytime to have a drink and chat. or maybe i should have really kept in touch to all the people i met so that they will remain my friends even after i got married.

i just wish that people wouldn't be too busy or too attached to their partner or too tired or too dedicated to their work or too many errands to do etc. etc. blah blah blah! i hope i am not the same too. i wish everyone will have the time... you know, to stop and smell the roses.

scared



taken from Adarna House site

i just have to document this...

the other night, i was reading to raya the book HOW DO YOU FEEL. it is one of the 10 concept books from the collection  READY FOR SCHOOL. we were discussing the different kinds of feelings. for raya to better grasp the concept of feeling, i was giving my own example when i am happy, sad, excited, etc. she was also giving her own. when we were discussing the SCARED feeling, i asked her when is she SCARED. she thought for a while then answered: "i am not scared because i always pray to God."

Amen!

saturday morning

this morning, we were finally ablle to do what we have always been planning to do which is to let the kids experience the outdooors. thank God everybody cooperated. it just takes waking up early on a saturday morning! haha!

so one of the venues on our list is of course the UP campus in diliman, quezon city. they were excited because of their new bikes and because of the experience. they were able to witness other people, adults and kids, who were also riding their bikes (in different colors and sizes!), jogging, walking, stretching and enjoying the 'street food'. i thought i won't sweat one bit. good thing i came prepared. haha. raya wants to 'race'. so one of us is pushing rob, and the other one, pushing raya. whew!

while resting under one of the big trees, we had corn as snacks. afterwhich, the girls played ball with their dad.

we're happy to see them run and play to keep them active. we want them to enjoy the outdoors. we want to engage them in sports as early as possible. keeps me and husband young too. ;)

what a great way to bond as a family. but this didn't end our morning escapade. after the play, we went to mcdonald's to have our breakfast. kids played at the playground for a long time. they were happy. we were happy.

i love saturday mornings such as this!

life is beautiful!

finding love



photo by Dino Lara

finding love is not easy. i consider myself so blessed to have found it in my husband who is also my best friend. i didn't have my fair share of heart aches, countless boyfriends, MU's, and the like. i also didn't have those "puppy love" kind of relationship.  i just had 1 serious boyfriend and i ended up marrying him. no regrets, really. infact, i am one lucky girl.

i hope that every girl could have the same experience.  i hope that my girls will also find their true love at the right time and age and especially with the right one. how? there's only 1 sure way that i know because it worked for me, and that is to pray! i was specific when i prayed to God of the qualities that i want in a man. and my husband is the exact match. but i think i failed to mention to God that that man must be filthy ultra mega rich. haha! joke!

now that i have two girls, i will tell them that. the other ways, well, i will advise them to collect and select. haha!  seriously, i still don't know what to do. i'll just cross the bridge when i get there. pray for the meantime. it never fails. besides, i know they will be different from me. time has changed. me and my husband could only do so much, that i know. we need to be open and share our experiences in order to guide them and give appropriate advise. and if there will come a time they will experience heart aches, we will definitely be there for them.

a few months ago, i came upon an article in a newspaper about love. i'm happy i was able to read it. i will post it here becuase i kinda agree with the writer, ana paje. someday, i will also let my girls read it. they may or may not completely agree with the writer, but its worth reading the article.

here it is.

 

Pag-ibig 101

By: Ana Catalina Paje
Philippine Daily Inquirer

January 9th, 2012

Let me just say that my dating life is not something I can brag about during drinking sessions. I have never been in a serious relationship, although I have had my fair share of “flirtationships’’ in the past.

In my early teens, I had the emotional maturity of a 5-year-old. I, along with countless other school girls, would swoon over the guy in the amateur band one day and go head over heels over the varsity stud the next day. But the bewitching power of the washboard abs and the electric guitar could only keep for so long. Needless to say, we moved on.

In a few years, teenage angst changed me. Violent PMS bouts and over-analyzing emo songs led me to believe that the perfect guy for me was an artist. I wiggled my way into the artists’ world of caffeine and nicotine. I penetrated their circles, indulging in poetry, abstract paintings, indie films and underground music. Coffee shops were suddenly the place to be for me.

For some bizarre reason, I talked like I was always on the verge of tears. But I never actually cried. Crying was for mainstream soap operas. I was not mainstream.

I began reading books on philosophy that I never really understood. I forced myself to use big words about isms in ordinary conversations. I wanted to believe I was hip, but the truth was that I was just a melodramatic wannabe intellectual.

Before long, I was involved in a pseudo-relationship with a fellow “hipster.” His ultra-deviant ways which bordered on the anti-social took its toll on me. One thing led to another, and we broke off whatever it was we had (or never had, to begin with), and I was back to my old pop culture self.

Somewhere along the way, I got so fed up with my unsuccessful attempts at relationships with men that I began to think that maybe I was queer. So I had yet another failed pseudo-relationship, this time with a woman. Fortunately, it did not end in tragedy like my previous pseudo-relationships. After all, we are just two girls who happened to be lonely at that time and sought comfort in each other. So we settled on friendship, and it turned out to be a great one.

You could say I have been in and out of the dating game for quite some time. Okay, so maybe most of it was cyber and I was only half-serious, but still. . .

My experience with commitments (or the lack thereof) has taught me a couple of things. One is that when you enter a relationship, only one of two things can happen: you either get married or you break up. So if you don’t see yourself having a family, raising kids, growing old or spending the rest of your life with your partner, something is wrong with the picture. It’s only a matter of time before the other option kicks in. As Antoine de Saint-Exupéry said, “Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction.” It could not have been put any better.

Hear me out and try to avoid the seemingly inevitable. Do not get too attached to spur-of-the-moment flings. Fleeting love(?) is bound to end in heartbreak. Spare your pillow the tears.

Two, falling in love was never meant to be an identity crisis. Don’t change for the person you (think you) love. Being the right person is being yourself. He either gets the full package or no package at all. What’s the point of being in a relationship if, in the confusion, you end up losing the most important thing: your gorgeous self?

Three, do not settle for an “MU’’ type of relationship—an open relationship, as some people call it. It’s like making love and leaving the windows wide open for all the neighbors to see and (God forbid) join. MU could mean Mag-isang Umiibig. With no loyalty, what proof of your partner’s love do you have? If you care for each other, move heaven and earth to make it work. There is no wrong time and wrong place for the right person. Do not complicate things. MU simply is Malabong Usapan.

Four, do yourself and the world a huge favor, and stop plotting revenge on your ex. Maybe the glass shoe didn’t fit the first time, Ms Bitterella. Plan A-1 may not have turned out to be bump-free as you expected it. But there are 25 other letters, and infinite numbers—more than you could ever count, or as many as there are fish in the sea. One fish out there in the ocean of possibilities is bound to be your perfect catch. One break-up doesn’t mean the end of the world. You are still young (and even if you are old), you deserve to be happy.

Five, you are a woman and you live in the 21st century. You are not a damsel in distress. Knights in shining armor are so last millennium. Make the first move. No, that doesn’t make you pathetic and desperate. It makes you a strong, intelligent woman who can adapt to change and is not afraid of her own feelings. However, it does make people who think otherwise a bunch of dimwits.

Six and most importantly, learn to love yourself. It is true that you can’t give what you don’t have. How can you expect to love and to be loved if, for some twisted reason, you don’t give yourself any respect?

That’s about everything I have learned. There are other lessons I am sure. But don’t try to give them to me in advance; I’m not a fan of spoilers. And I am sorry if I sounded preachy. Tough love, I guess.

Take it from this single (not bitter, but just sane enough) girl: Relationships tend to be messy, so unless you are sure, don’t gamble. Love is an investment with no money-back guarantee. If all else fails, be guided by reason but follow your heart.

happy ever after

hubby and i have been together for almost 11 years now (6 years married and 5 years as bf-gf) and i still couldn't get used to it everytime he is away. it may seeem cheesy but it's the truth. oh no, i hope i am not too dependent on him. anyway, i'm just saying that its different when he is not around. its different when i know he won't be sleepiing with me and the kids at night for a few days.

hopefully, we'll always be together and grow old together and have a happy ever after.

a visit to the province

about a week ago, me and raya went to the province. we've been meaning to visit sorsogon, bicol for the longest time already to visit my lola. i can't remember the last time i was there. i was really young then. it's the hometown of my mom. it's how as i remembered it, just a few changes especially since they are trying to renovate their ancestral house.

even the chairs and tables are still there!
i even have a pic of me here while i was a kid!

it was just me and raya since hubby have an event from work. i didn't bring rob with us since i cannot handle the two kids alone. bringing yaya is not an option :) besides, i don't know what to expect once we get there, and rob still so young, and there is still a land travel of 1.5 hours from legaspi to sorsogon, and then lola is sick, everyone busy, etc. i know there will be a next time.

anyway, its a different trip this time. a different experience especially for raya. it was her first to go to a province. first time to sleep in a different house. first time to see a sick person ...

it must have been the tube and lola being bed ridden that scared raya

first time to meet a special child, in this case, my mom's brother, tito bong (or lolo bong for raya).

we visited a barangay and gave clothes, shoes and candies. it was also a first for raya and so she just stood in a corner and observed.

its true what they say that time is slow in the province. my daughter noticed that and keeps on saying "im bored". good thing i brought her activity book and puzzles to keep her occupied. thanks too that tito rodel is there to play with her while i sleep and sleep and eat and eat. and thank God for grammy's new iphone 4s for her to tinker with.

the bed and the framed Mama Mary are older than my mom

it wasn't that bad. as i've said, naninibago lang. we were there to visit my sick lola and to celebrate her 92nd birthday. raya helped fix flowers and entertain guests.

we also visited some beaches. we didn't swim. just took pics and breathe lots of fresh air.

rizal beach

bulusan lake

some of these might be new to raya. she observes and try the new things. while i on the other hand, relinquished the past, look at old photos, hear stories, met with relatives and enjoyed the food.



fresh fish. laing

puto. suman

pidot, the adoptive son of lola, cooks well



mom's family



till the next adventure. and hopefully we'll be able to go around more and see places such as the magnificent mayon volcano. and next time, i'll bring my hole family.