i am humbled

the year 2010 was really a rough ride for us, for me. i think it is evident through my posts. i could hear myself whining and crying. but i could also remember praying real hard and just calling out His name. and then i became impatient and just gave up.

early 2011, an unexpected blessing came. or was it the answered prayer we were waiting for? anyway, i cried my heart out. i was, still am, humbled. i vowed not to give up and to be more patient. i suddenly remember that He has never given up on me.                      

not once.

the year 2011 was an ok ride. there are trials of course, but remembering my promise, i kept the faith and just held on. this made the ride easier. so many blessings and challenges to thank for.

i try to remember that the hardships are meant to happen for me to learn. i try to thank God for every single thing, big and small. i try to be better and to pay it forward. i am bringing it with me this year [2012] and the succeeding years.

new learnings

books, friends and most of all, experiences really does teach us a lot. despite the chores and errands that i have to do, i can squeeze reading in my daily routine. it either relaxes me or gives me information that keeps my mind working. i am blessed to be surrounded by honest friends who share with me their own learnings and words of wisdom which helps me cope and understand life especially motherhood. and these talks are shared over lunch, dinner or coffee. yipee! my experiences are presented by God, of course. the best tool to convey His messages and a great way to teach me well. ;)

i've learned three things lately and i try to keep it on my mind.

• "her convictions are not your convictions"

there was a time that i worry (well, i atill am) about my good friend's relationship with her present boyfriend. i know she thinks that i disapprove of it, but i just don't believe that there is something worthy to keep the relationship. they are not friends in the first place. no relationship with God. the guy does not even have a stable religion.  and lastly, age and social status are way to big a gap. perhaps i don't know the guy completely, but hey, he does not give us the opportunity to know him more. he does not even try. we do. there is just no connection. he might be shy. but it's been more than a year. and my goodness, we are his GF's childhood friends! we are like sisters! as my friend says, her convictions are not your convictions. so if my friend thinks that the relationship is worth trying, or he is the one for her, so be it. even if it is far from her ideal kind of relationship. let her be. if she makes a mistake, then let her experience it and learn from it. and i'll still be here for her as a friend.

• "just because something is fun for someone else doesn't mean it is fun for ME as well, and vice versa"

true. nobody has to conform. you don't have to like some things just because other people enjoys it. a sport, a hobby, a collection of things, fashion, etc. however, it is different if doing something fun with your loved ones is at stake here. i don't really enjoy watching cartoons and violent movies. but i would watch cartoons with my daughters and be on a movie date with my husband. i might not enjoy the movie, but definitely, i enjoy the company. i love sweets especially cakes. my husband doesn't. and i don't force him to like it too. he enjoys giving it to me though. aaawww. now, that is fun! one just have to accept that we each have different likes and dislikes. different stokes for different folks. deal with it.

• "you must strive to find sources of feeling good"

we all must not forget ourselves. we need this to keep on going. I need it to find fulfillment. it's a different kind of high. because for me, it is important that i maximize my time. i am at a quest to find my gifts. it is the challenge. the learnings. and at the end of it, the reward will be unbelievable, i know. and so we must find what we really love to do and just be ourselves. simple plesures to big things, we must not forget to feel good. anyway, life is short. life is hard. why make it harder? ;) 

and remember that no matter what, you are who you are, or i am ME,  and know that God will love me for who and what i am.